Thursday, January 27, 2011

Got Faith?

You know how some people say "I was just lucky I guess" or "I was in the right place at the right time" or "it was just fate" or "the gods were with me"?  I don't believe in any of that.  I believe everything happens for a reason.  I believe God has His hand in everything that occurs, even if it is you choosing your own will over God's plan…He is all over it.  Sometimes He tells you something through scripture, or through a friend, a pastor, or sometimes he speaks to you in you head or your heart.  You don't really know how he's going to get a message to you.  But you need to be open to anything.

I have been pondering or should I say paralyzed in the thought of a new job.  I applied because someone told me I needed to…sort of on a whim.  I had been recently updating my resume of which I hadn't even remembered I had created until I found it in my computer.  So I emailed it off.  I didn't really even expect to get an interview.  I presumed lots of qualified folks would apply and I'd be weeded out.  Well, low and behold they called me for an interview.  Not really even knowing what the job entailed, I interviewed.  The findings were that it's a BIG job, some clean up work, supervision over 11 employees, personnel issues, community work, being "on-call".  But most of all they needed a year or more commitment.  I was not at all sure I wanted to give them that.  Well, I was pretty sure I didn't.  They called me back for the second interview.  She expressed that I had done phenomenal in the first interview that the board members were very impressed with me.  However, even though that was very flattering, I told her…"I can't commit to that amount of time, but thanks"…in much nicer words.  It just seemed too big and too overwhelming to me and perhaps I lacked the confidence even though I had several tell me "you can do this job".  And another reason, fear of the unknown.  It can be paralyzing.  I know.  I lived like that for years.  Then I got a call from one of the board members asking me to reconsider the job.  Wow, now what?  I talked to friends and family again, they encouraged me to do it.  Financially and career wise, it is a fabulous opportunity.  Yes, there would be some negatives and some stress, but look at the positives and how it would affect my retirement and my career opportunities in the future.  No, I would not be moving anytime soon to south Texas closer to my grandson, however, he's still young and hopefully there is lots of time for that.  Especially if I am more financially stable.  Well, so I prayed, then fretted all night, didn't sleep, prayed more, fretted more, was sick at my stomach, finally got up at 5:00a.m.  "Please God send a "word".  What do I do"?  I have never been good at making decisions, especially big ones.  Never.  It's a fault.  This morning early I called a friend and asked her to pray for me.  She did.  I read this scripture which is one I love, "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you" (John 14:27).  I felt better.  I made the call to a the board member who I had told no to and asked to have my name put back in the hat.  She wavered a bit, but said she would call me this afternoon.  The board was meeting at noon.  Then the gal who asked me to reconsider finally called.  She said I was the executive committee's first choice.  She said she knew I could do this job.  She was extremely encouraging.   She was headed to the meeting to tell them she wanted me back in.  I agreed.  I was still feeling a bit sick, but better.  Oh my, this is huge.  Then I read something else that seemed to be "the word" I had been seeking.  It's about not just waiting on things to happen to you, but making choices about your future.  It was about believing the best begets the best. 

The following is what I read…
"So many people are waiting for that perfect moment, but that right moment never shows up. We have to create that moment. Our destiny isn't about fate, it's about a choice."

And the other…
"Success is built on an attitude that being challenged in life is inevitable; being defeated is optional.  I think it's about perception and perspective.  If you give yourself the freedom to know that anything is possible, and you keep having faith, belief, and perseverance despite the odds, you will eventually arrive at the top of the mountain."

So regardless of what happens now, I have made a choice; a choice to get back in the race and believe and have faith and trust that God has me right where He wants me; that He will open doors if I will watch for them and He will answer me if I listen.  While I still have some anxiety about this, I will keep praying.
"God hold me in the palm of your hand.  That is where I feel the safest". 

Encourage One Another

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